Well, I have been 100% game free for two weeks now. I started taking driving lessons and going out more. "Going out" is probably too strong a word since for me it's currently limited to taking 1 hour walks every day or every other day depending on the situation.
Those of you who read my story, know that prior to me quitting games, I was mostly very unhealthy, and suffered from a host of mental and physical problems. Despite still being anxious and nervous every time I go outside, I am happy to report that overall my health is not too bad. Because I don't currently have a job or many friends, I find myself pretty bored. (I am looking for a job, but as you probably know these things don't just drop out from the sky)
I feel like a wolf stuck in a small cage, with nothing to do but to pace back and fourth. I feel pretty confused and chaotic, and I constantly feel like I owe somebody something or I forgot to do something, even though I don't owe nothing to anyone, and there's nothing that really needs to be done ASAP. Yet I just cant shake this **** feeling...
It's funny, but I cant say I "truly" miss games, although I do miss the feeling of "escape from reality" the gave me. If I picked up a game right now, and started playing it, I'd do it not because it's fun, and not because I really want to, but because for this time I wouldn't be thinking about everything I mentioned above. There was already a few occasions where I really wanted to launch a game and start playing. But I didn't! I gotta say that I'm pretty proud of myself, because I tried quitting in the past and failed miserably every time. I think the most I lasted was a week or so. This time it's 2 weeks, and I'm still going strong despite my psychological issues. Every time I want to go to www.gamespot.com that I used to visit several times every day, I go to this site. I'm probably coming here a little too often, but hey... Whatever helps, right?
I fear I might be losing what little friends I have left. The only way they could identify with me lately is by either playing or discussing video games. And now even that is gone... They kept calling me, asking me why I wont play, and I explained again and again, but that wasn't good enough. They kept saying one little game couldn't hurt... They asked me to play again and again. At one point I almost broke, and said I will play next weekend, but when the time came, I refused, to my friend's disappointment. He said he understands, but he barely calls anymore... That's fine though. I guess sacrifices need to be made.
Because I cant find anything to do, I've been working out every single day. I'm trying to not go overboard with heavy lifting... about 70% of my workouts consist of cardio or low weight exercising. (trying to burn off that belly) Every time I start feeling lonely, depressed, or chaotic, I start working out. I try to get in the "zone" and not think about anything else. It does help sometimes... I still spend quite a bit of time on my PC overall, but I try to do it less every day.
That's basically it for now. I will write an update in a week or so.
How are you guys doing? Are you having any similar problems? Do you also feel hyper, lonely, bored, or like you owe somebody something? Do you feel something different? What are your coping strategies? Please share.
Blessed is the mind too small for doubt...
Hi, it's great to have you here! Those first few weeks are tough. It's hard to believe, but I'm coming up on 7 months away from gaming! Exercise is really helpful, and I'm convinced it's saving my life too. Working on relationships is even harder than getting in physical shape. Keep doing the good work you're doing; I'm sure you'll continue to recover your real life, one day at a time. Congratulations on all your recent success!
The happiness of a man in this life does not consist in the absence but in the mastery of his passions.
-Alfred Lord Tennyson
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