I'm 29 and I'm addicted to gaming. I can play for a whole day without getting tired. I've been like this since I was a child, gaming and watching TV. I blew $20 on an arcade machine on a Cub Scout skiing trip and missed lunch. I've used friends to play games, hanging out with them just for gaming purpose. I'm a writer and actor, so I have copious amounts of time on my hands at home. I know I can be excellent at what I do if I dedicate myself, but the idea of having that much time on my hands terrifies me.
I've gone months without gaming before, but something always grabs me and sucks me in. This has been a major, debilitating part of my life for many years. I understand how it's affecting me, but I can't fully stop. I tell myself I'll stop in an hour, then go past the hour because I still have to finish a quest or personal goal.
I want to turn it off completely. I think about games in real life. I see imprints of the games I've played when I close my eyes. I've given up more than I'm willing to admit and I'm tired of waking up after a gaming binge to see who I am and what I've done to myself.
I'm currently signed up for my first therapy session next week. I'm hoping to get to the bottom of this and I'm terrified of what I'll find. I know that I play games to avoid the world and reality. It looks so easy for most people, but it seems impossible for me... But if I'm going to be happy and healthy I MUST figure this out and beat it.
But I don't want to beat it. I enjoy gaming. It's been an identifying part of me since I was a kid and letting that go means I'll have to fill the hole it will leave... Probably with very positive and fulfilling things. Hopefully.
I need to grow up. I'm living with a wonderful woman who I want to marry, but I can't do any of that until I'm completely done.
Sounds like you know what to do. You don't have to do it alone. Come to some meetings and make connections. We're here for each other.
What you feed grows, and what you starve withers away.
Hi TJ and welcome to Olga. You're in the right place. Stopping gaming isn't easy, but if we want any kind of life, we must stop. And many of us are doing it with the help of others like ourselves in this community. I would encourage you to use the resources here - read posts, post what you'are going through, answer other's post to support and encourage them and attend meetings. It all helps. Best of luck to you.
Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending. ~Maria Robinson
Hey TJ and welcome.
I was the same way knew I needed to stop wasting my time playing games but didnt want to stop. I spent a year telling my self I could just moderate my play time which worked a few days only to become out of hand later. I finally decided to I had stop if i wanted to prevent loosing everything. I have urges and it is hard not playing something I really enjoyed but the real life I missed out on is amazing and not being in a constant game fog has opened up my eyes. Like Scott and Silvertabby said come to meetings. It is hard but not impossible especially when you are supported by others going through the exact same struggles.
"Yesterday is History, Tomorrow a Mystery, Today is a Gift, Thats why it's called the Present"
TJ, I attend therapy myself and, for me, it has helped immensely. Although I have other issues besides gaming, it has helped me to get a better grasp on what leads me to my obsessions and compulsions. From what I understand there are many types of therapy... for me I'm involved in the therapy where you change your thought patterns to change your life. I went into it expecting kind of a quick fix, but the more I worked with my therapist, and the deeper we went, it was like we'd have to start all over again, but just at a deeper layer. For me, it has taken years to build up my compulsions and it's not gonna be undone in just a couple sessions. Feel good knowing that you're doing the right thing asking for help, and be open to however long the process may take for you.