I am the mother of a 24 year old son who is the definition of a gamer. He has no life besides the one on the headset. The few times he has tried to get a job, he was not called back. I believe it is more for a lack of references and the unwillingness to obtain a driver's license. His health is suffering as well. I am so lost on what to do and where to go at this point. I have made numerous ultimatums and promises to no avail. He is socially awkward and refuses to go for counseling if I ask. If his father and I were to pass away unexpectedly he would be desolate. I regret the day I ever bought that first game for him when he was growing up. Any help or advice would be so appreciated!
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Lyssa B
I think my videos and book (PM me and I will send you the PDF) will help.
My videos are: www.realbattle.org/seminars/
Andrew P. Doan, MPH, MD, PhD
My Gaming Addiction Videos on YouTube: YouTube.com/@DrAndrewDoan
*The views expressed are of the author's and do not necessarily reflect the official policy of the U.S. Navy, DHA or Department of Defense.
Welcome to Olganon Lyssa
I empathise with you because I have a son who is very similar to yours. I found it really helpful to keep coming back and read other parents stories, and then to form my own plan of action. You need to keep coming back to help the information become part of you because you need to understand all the issues and after you have made your plan, remain stong to carry it though.
As parents we need to realise that we are enabling our children to continue in this very sad life. We can realise that for things to change we need to start to make changes in our homes so that it is not so comfortable or possible for them to continue as they currently do. It's a hard process but the end goal makes it worthwhile. It centres around the concept that it's our house, our rules. And; we chose to no longer allow gaming or whatever vice, in our home if the child wants to keep living there. We are not keeping them prisoner in our home. They can leave if they don't like it. They have to start to feel the consequences of their choices to start to grow. While they are gaming they are staying as adolescents and not maturing emotionally.
This is the first post you should start with
http://www.olganon.org/forum/i-need-help-parents-gamers-open-forum/help-i-think-my-adult-child-addicted-video-games
There is a typed chat meeting for parents on Thursday at 9pm EDT which you may find very supportive
My son would not get therapy to start with. He has now been to several sessions because eventually we made it part of the rules for him to continue to remain at home. It is for his social anxiety rather than gaming addiction as he denies he has a problem with that.
If you can get him used to doing tasks that bring him into contact with other people on a gradual basis then that would be helpful. Decide if you want to wean him off screen time gradually or go cold turkey. There are also programs like reStart in seattle which may be able to help him.
Once you are learning about this addicition and start to make a plan i think that the dread will start to lift from your heart because there are things you can do and we can support you through the process. You are not alone.
INFO
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