hello... My name is John and I am an online gaming addict. A recovering addict with 27 days clean from Everquest. I've never been at my best when I've been gaming for six hours and haven't a thing to show for it, save a twitch and a full bladder. I am recovering within this website, because here i have found a great deal of support. Not just lip-service, but if you too take some time and read some of the posts here, you also will find many different kinds of advice for the same question: "How did you quit & how can I regain what I seem to have misplaced?"
I misplaced the duty of the loving husband and partner I was to my darling wife. She is still the apple of my eye, and everytime I see her, I swear its true, I fall in love with her all over again. We are, or were, two peas in a pod, very close in personality and intrests, except for online gaming. I found EQ just days before I found my future wife. We met online but we were both looking within our immediate area. After we met and found we liked each other we dated and soon were cohabitating with plans for marriage. We finally got married last year and it was magical and has been ever since.
She HATES Everquest and rightly so, its like having a mistress, except shes right there in the house with us. And I'm not ever ashamed to turn to her right in front of my wife. I have read so many of the excuses I too have repeated for the explanation of why I kept playing. I have lied about my gametime... hidden my gametime... even lied to myself when I knew I was not doing the right things. So now I have made a choice, not to renew my subscription, to delete all my files and screenshots, to not visit game related sites and to not play anymore, all... to get me back to where I was
Snowhite said it good just the other day.. "I guess what I am trying to say is believe in the potential you have inside you to be that awesome husband you were before. To be the person you want to be and don't feel obligated to be by some stupid game." Today, I am an awesome husband, I am the person I want to be and that person is a recovering online gaming addict!
Thanks for allowing me to be of service ~ John
"There is little difference in people, but that little difference makes a big difference. The little difference is attitude. The big difference is whether it is positive or negative." --W. Clement Stone
*beams* Glad that something I said can change some spot inside of you! It just brings tears to my eyes to hear such a wonderufl affirmation!! My dear friend, it will take time to be the husband of good habits, but who's counting moments that it takes - you're gaining memories back in the meantime... memories that can last forever... I'm so proud of your 28 days clean! You're going to be the best ever. If you put a note on your mirror in washable marker and write one on the fridge - everytime you see that affirmation of "I will be an awesome husband today" you believe it, and your actions will speak it. You're doing so great! Glad to have you around! Hug that wife of yours! :) Tell her I said Great job too!
"This is the end...." The Doors
Hello, John. Thanks for sharing your story. It's amazing how quickly things can turn for the better once we've unloaded that yoke, isn't it? It isn't always easy, but change happens rather quickly and each day it becomes a bit easier - For me, I found the 4 month period to be when I finally felt that I didn't have that "gnawing" anymore to play. At six months my life was in much better shape all around than it was six months earlier. A day at a time, brother. Ron
Co-Founder of OLGA and member since 2002
I just read my post...
That's right, its me, LongJohn, under a pseudoname.
The evil, maligned dude who was always beating up on the poor gamers.
I'm back gaming, but they dont do anything for me after a short time.
I play about an hour and stop.
I am working very well at my new job and trying my best to be the best husband I can.
Life is good, and OLGA helped me realize what is good in life, and what might threaten that for me.
I don't post much anymore because of all the flack i got for choosing to speak my mind over the confusion that some people were doling out here like gospel. I have thought about you all as friends, you know who you are, and have good thoughts about you! I am okay. Life is good... so far! Gamelessly
"There is little difference in people, but that little difference makes a big difference. The little difference is attitude. The big difference is whether it is positive or negative." --W. Clement Stone
Oh John, so glad you're back. Please be careful with the gaming. I remember how fast my son got sucked back in when he picked it up again after he quit the first time. I'm glad to hear you lose interest after an hour, but you know those game companies are working overtime to find a way to keep your interest. Be careful and take care of yourself.
"Small service is true service while it lasts. Of humblest friends, bright creature! scorn not one
The daisy, by the shadow that it casts,
Protects the lingering dewdrop from the sun." -------William Wordsworth
Beware of the downward spiral. An hour becomes two.A Two become three.A Three become four, until you've realized you've spent the entire evening gaming. You stop spending time with loved ones. You go to bed a few hours later, just to get that one quest completed. I strongly caution anyone who's felt he's had a problem gaming against "casual" gaming. Please don't let it consume you. Love, Solei
-6 Years Free of Online Gaming-
Thanks for your kind words, kind of. Understanding where you are coming from, I understand your emapthy. Don't worry about me, and thanks for your attention at the least. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr Who me, Quest? Bah! It's stress relief Baby. I started an Ebay sellers account and that takes too much time to quest, group or anything ingame that takes any single time committment. Oh, and please dont gang up on me right off... Thanks
"There is little difference in people, but that little difference makes a big difference. The little difference is attitude. The big difference is whether it is positive or negative." --W. Clement Stone
[size=14]Welcome Back John, Glad to hear you are doing well. I was a bit worried when you mentioned you were planning on gaming again. Just be careful is all we are saying.[/size]
" ... don't question it just go" "... where the body goes the mind will follow"
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Borrowed from "Desire to Stop"
John, good luck in whatever you do... Please understand, noone here ganged up on people... itA's just that people independantly form their opinions and sometimes come to the same conclusions. We all need lotA's of healing, and some people may be more sensitive to words and opinions then others. We are here to help and heal each other, but not forcefully and not hurriedly, but in a slow steady pace. A rushing torrent is very strong and dashing for a short time, but it may then overextend itself and leave the spring it came from dried out. Love and Light Max
Welcome back, John....and good luck
JOHN Thank you for sharing your experiences. You have helped me being a dad and husband come to my own conclusions. Yes good luck in your life ventures.