So I am still struggling with gaming. Finally, today I took a pair of scissors to the cord conneccting the monitor to my computer. I discontinued my internet service (I now pick up wirelss from the cafe down the street, but the service is not great). Now my computer sits up on the window sill(so I can pick up the wireless), as I, with my keyboard, sit on my bed so I can access the internet and type here at OLGA.
Now this may sound insane, but it is not nearly as maddening as spending 5 days sitting at a computer playing world of tanks.
There is nothing healthy about me gamijng. I have put on 25(10kg) pounds of weight as all I do is eat junk food and drink soda. Although it is almost time for me to leave the army reserves they have written me up for being overweight. When I game I do not exercise at all.
This weekend I was supposedto travel to a convention wiht friends. Of course I changed my nind and did not go just so I could gaeme instead. I am not good at keeping my word or plans when I am gaming.Conveniantly I justified the buying of in game currency and a new virtual tank by saying "well this is cheaper than spending money at a convention with my mates.)
So this is where I am at currently. I knew things werre not going well when I started to setup another Second Life account. I have not been on SL for more than a year. thankfully I stopped myself.
Anyway glad you are all here. All the best, Dirk.
No, World of Tanks and Second Life, I will not play you or your brethren today. At least I hope not. one day at a tiiiiiiime. Last day I gamed is now 13 May 2012.
Hey Dirk,
I totally get it. Sorry you went back to games but glad you came back here. When I'm playing I'll lie to myself constantly about it, neglect other responsibilities for it, generally cheat, etc. A very bad dynamic. So I can't play.
Ok, you are game free for at least one hour as I post this. Congratulations! Hang in there.
I am a recovering computer game and gambling addict. My recovery birthday: On May 6, 2012 I quit games and began working a program of recovery through OLGA No computer games or slot games for me since December 12, 2012. No solitaire games with real cards since June 2013.
Sorry to hear you're struggling so badly, dirk. Sometimes drastic measures are needed and I hope yours will help you finally quit once and for all.
Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending. ~Maria Robinson
Glad you're here too dirk! keep coming back, friend! :)
Sincerely,
JJ
"Always bear in mind that your own resolution to succeed is more important than any other" -Abraham Lincoln
Dirk, Just hang on. Try to find a hobby that keeps you occupied enough. And when I hear you, try Cofnitive behaviour therapy, it can work identify "the Why". and how the brak the habit.
pre- diagnosed with Autism.
One day gone without gaming.
No, World of Tanks and Second Life, I will not play you or your brethren today. At least I hope not. one day at a tiiiiiiime. Last day I gamed is now 13 May 2012.
Hi Dirk,
I find that working on Step 1 really helps with staying game-free. It's the basis of the program. I'm here because I don't know how to NOT game. Yeah, when I game my life becomes unmanageable (WoW WRECKED my life), but if that were my only problem I would just stop gaming. The reason I come here is that I don't know how to STAY stopped. Before I came here I had "quit" at least a dozen times.
Knowing that I don't know how to stop makes it easier to ignore those voices that tell me "gaming will make this better". Gaming never made it better in the past but somehow my addict just ignores all that evidence, he just keeps saying "gaming will make this better". He lies to me all the time.
So I don't have to fight with those thoughts, I just have to not believe them. When I focus on my recovery those thoughts lose their power. Keep coming back - it works.
Game free since 11/24/2011 (Thanksgiving Day). One Day at a Time.
Available by phone (904)437-0761.
hey Dirk. Hang in there man. I'm glad you decided to get back into your First Life, or Real Life, heh. I remember making similar financial justifications about money. I tried to explain to my wife that I could be spending serious time and money on golf, for example... but not seriously, just a way to justify my subs and boxes.
Andy, that's something I was thinking about earlier today. I remember gaming to avoid dealing with the hardships of adult life, then getting consequences, and using gaming as my escape from them... in an endless viscious cycle. My wife would give me hard times for gaming instead of being involved in the marriage or family, and to console myself I'd dive further into the games. Sad addiction logic.
OLGA Home Page: "We advocate and provide a 12-Step Program of recovery. For those who are interested in a formalized meeting approach, we provide both a traditional 12-step program and a modified program for atheists and agnostics." I advocate and use the 12 steps programs, which have helped tens of millions of addicts of all kinds recover.
Thanks all for your support, I do appreicate it. I now have completed 2 days without gaming and working on the start of day 3.
No, World of Tanks and Second Life, I will not play you or your brethren today. At least I hope not. one day at a tiiiiiiime. Last day I gamed is now 13 May 2012.
Well here is a little more support, keep it up and congrats on your 2 days without gaming :)
The first days is the hardest ones. Stay strong, I can promise you its so much better on the other side. The journey might be long and hard but its worth every second of life I now live without games. My life atm is living at home with my mom, going to counseling, paying of debt not doing much. Most people would think I have a pathetic life. But its still 100000 times better then the life I had when I played games.
Stay strong! It might seem impossible but its not. The first 2 months I had twitches, headaches, an extreme urge and anger. Problems sleeping, problems staying awake, problems eating. But it wears of inn time. First week is the worst week. Then it slowly gets better, trust me. First I counted hours, then I counted days, then weeks, then months. Now I`m finaly counting years. 1 year with no gaming of any sort.
Take one day at a time. Try and find other stuff to do. I`ve been thinking "I`ll play games tomorow but not today" for over a year. Its possible. Good luck!!
Dirk, if you have someone you can trust, perhaps an idea to have K9 webprotection installed and have your friend secure a password? That may buy you time to calm down as soon you want to game,...and realize its not good?
It can block all sites registred to anuything, and gaming is amongst them
pre- diagnosed with Autism.
Good for you Dirk!
I've had lots of temptations during this last year to game again; I hate that thought but it does come up since I gamed excessively for 8 solid years and my body and mind are much too used to gaming than living a real life.
I do a lot of things to change that "gaming thought": exercise, get more involved in my loved ones, changed all my habits (only get on computer when answering email or posting on OLGA), got out in yard more and did physical work, exercised and walked, learning to cook delicious simple meals with fresh food, writing letters to all my ignored friends who "still" don't have computers, getting to bed earlier and getting up earlier, etc.
And if the temptation gets really bad (only gotten bad twice so far in 11 months) I write out a complete unadulterated first step: how it was, what it became, and how my life is now. That is a real eye-opener.
Big hugs.