In the program, we are encouraged to make small but lasting changes in our behavior. This is because the experiences of many recovering addicts have been that large changes in behavior usually can't be sustained over time. Willpower only takes us so far--we must learn a new way of living. That's hard for us, and it takes time. Here are some of the slogans we use to remind ourselves of this:
Easy Does It
One Step at a Time
First Things First
12 Miles into the Forest, 12 Miles out
Do the Next Right Thing
Be Gentle with Yourself
I ran across a TeD talk by a researcher in behavioral change that shows that what the recovering addicts in the fellowship have known for a long time can be shown scientifically. In this talk, he shares with the audience how to develop a new habit. I found it fascinating and I started applying it right away (actually, I started applying some of it a while ago at the suggestion of my sponsors, but I see it even more clearly now).
The title is: Forget Big Change, Start with a Tiny Habit
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AdKUJxjn-R8
FWIW
I am a recovering computer game and gambling addict. My recovery birthday: On May 6, 2012 I quit games and began working a program of recovery through OLGA No computer games or slot games for me since December 12, 2012. No solitaire games with real cards since June 2013.
I am Super Awesome!
It's good to have goals and dreams, but while you're waiting for things to change, waiting for promises to come to pass, don't be discontent with where you are. Learn to enjoy the season that you're in--Pastor Joel Osteen
The ingredients to Behavior change: Every tiny little things count!
Motivation
Ability to do
Trigger: Action
I am awesome!
Awesome Maggie
It's good to have goals and dreams, but while you're waiting for things to change, waiting for promises to come to pass, don't be discontent with where you are. Learn to enjoy the season that you're in--Pastor Joel Osteen
This video struck me so much when he talked about the little celebration - "I'm Awesome!" I mean, isn't this the mechanism in our heads that got us hooked on games in the first place?
Think about it - when you accomplish something the game throws a little party. The flag is lowered and there's a little victory music. Your avatar holds the new found treasure over his head while the victory music plays. The disembodied voice exclaims "HEADSHOT!" They are short little passing celebrations - and then on to the next thing, next level, next monster, next puzzle. It's almost like the game is purposely programming us.
It strikes me that when we quit, we leave a life full of little celebrations when we quit and enter a bleak world. No victory music plays when I replace the toilet paper.
I like the idea of taking this force that has been so distructive to me and repurposing it. I can take the power of the little celebration and put it into my life where I need it. I can sing my victory song when I replace the toilet paper tube.
Here are my small habits that I have started today -
When I enter the house, I will hug or kiss my wife.
(Purpose: I want to be a more loving person.)
When I pee, I will check and make sure the spare toilet paper tube is in its spot.
(Purpose: We ALWAYS run out and I have to get more from the pantry. Is a source of resentment.)
LOL. That's one to remember!
I am a recovering computer game and gambling addict. My recovery birthday: On May 6, 2012 I quit games and began working a program of recovery through OLGA No computer games or slot games for me since December 12, 2012. No solitaire games with real cards since June 2013.
This post was EXACTLY what I needed! I have been through recovery before for another addiction and pretty much lost all the little saying we use and needed a reminder. I've heard a lot of the concepts in this video but not quite the way this guy presented it and its so easy i've already started using it and after 2 days i can tell you it's already made a difference. Thank you!
CONGRATULATIONS on 2 Years of Recovery !
i actually struggled on my own to stop gaming, very hard decision and follow through time in widhtdrawal.. but i didnt knew how to rehabilitate myself to actually get back to doing daily life and even household chores.. and i staryed watching series as an alternative to gaming.. it helped as i could pause at any time.. but eventually i started getting addicted to series and started binge watching everything.. and prime video etc apps made it easier for me to acess series..
So this video has the idea and content that clicks with me.. and i feel that i have tool to do a lot of piled up responsibilites and chores and lists.. just little part of it at a time.. i am really happy.. Thankyou bro!!
dammy